The parable of the Prodigal Son is my source of enlightenment. I have read this parable many times in the past. It did not register in my mind until lately when I found its implication worth remembering.
For many years, I neglected a friend but despite the lack of reciprocity on my part, this friend continued to shower me unconditional love and attention. A recent experience unfolded a far-reaching revelation. I was awakened from a deep sleep. My bent blindness was removed and more importantly, the experience allowed me to see immensely a HEART in a friend whom I have known for more than twenty five (25) years.
Let me start with an assessment of my character. I perceive myself surrounded with multitude of friends. My life evolves on my friends and I guess this view will continue until the day I die. My friends are not my collection. They came to me just like destiny. I have no standards in choosing friends. Luckily, I can mingle and go out with diverse types of personalities. I find this character an asset and I relentlessly thank God of my gift of patience and understanding. I find no difficulty in accepting a person for what he or she is. I survived several clashes and invasions of temperaments in the past, reinforcing my confidence in the quality of friendship which I am capable to establish.
My network is so vast and dynamic. I acted like a conduit. My friends eventually became friends widening or expanding our circle. Some became very good friends too while others remained as acquaintances. Of course, you cannot impose friendship. This is a cardinal rule. I tried to disprove this rule but I failed. There were some friends I tried to bridge however notwithstanding the effort they ended neither as friends nor acquaintances. When asked, they would simply say that no bond exists. Amusingly, there were also incidents that enemies have to cross each other’s path because of me. I actually acquired the skills of mediation and arbitration because of these climatic episodes.
Though I already learned many lessons about friendship, my leaning to the belief that I’m a connoisseur of friendship shatters those lessons I learned. Oftentimes this disorder exposes me in looming emotional distress. The turning point of this realization came when a friendship which I embedded for about three years faltered. My trusting nature is now something I mistrust. It was really my fault for having invested too much emotion on a friendship knowing that it is supposedly uncompromising. My tendency to expect for reciprocity breaks the general rule of true friendship. I am fully aware that to quantify friendship is a taboo. But how do you expect me to behave if I feel aggrieved, prejudiced and betrayed. How can I control myself if caught in the web of anxiety and distrust? The situation induces me to choose an entirely different gauge for friendship. I hate deception and hypocrisy and so I speak of the realistic point of view of friendship.
Oftentimes, people prefer to search for more rather than to enhance those that already exist. A friendship for twenty years is something I can sing with my own praises. On the other hand, it is now the source of my guilt or regret. I listed litany of complaints against my so-called “good friends” who wronged me, but I never had the chance to question myself for neglecting a friend who unobtrusively stood by me all these years. This friend showered me with attention, care and even material things yet no reciprocity was demanded. I took for granted our friendship simply because it was unconditional and unqualified. I was never scared to lose this friend. Why? Our friendship is beyond physical presence. We’ve been away from each other for months or even years, but we still ended up being together most of the time. Just like sisters, we are unaffected by our imperfections. We developed some sort of immunity from our unpleasant traits. Treating her as one of my siblings warded off any opportunity for me to grasp her importance as a FRIEND. We call each other best friends for many years. It was quite easy for me to articulate said introduction.
But today is different! Not only that I value any introduction I make with regards to this friend, I sincerely stand with pride being beside her. I cherish every moment I am with her., I appreciate everything she did for me and my immediate family. I know she loves me and for this, she also learned to love those whom I love.
Shrouded by exhaustion, I decided to stop searching; A time to finally surrender my self-importance. I now thank those friends who mistreated me. It was through these painful experiences I realized what I have failed to cultivate these past years… a relationship that is worth preserving. With full of sentiments, I salute my BEST FRIEND FOR TWENTY FIVE YEARS. I renew my friendship this time with maturity and commitment. I will grow old with you, I will respect your person and I will love you unconditionally and always for what you are!
In the end, a prodigal friend like me when reformed can still be a true friend.
For many years, I neglected a friend but despite the lack of reciprocity on my part, this friend continued to shower me unconditional love and attention. A recent experience unfolded a far-reaching revelation. I was awakened from a deep sleep. My bent blindness was removed and more importantly, the experience allowed me to see immensely a HEART in a friend whom I have known for more than twenty five (25) years.
Let me start with an assessment of my character. I perceive myself surrounded with multitude of friends. My life evolves on my friends and I guess this view will continue until the day I die. My friends are not my collection. They came to me just like destiny. I have no standards in choosing friends. Luckily, I can mingle and go out with diverse types of personalities. I find this character an asset and I relentlessly thank God of my gift of patience and understanding. I find no difficulty in accepting a person for what he or she is. I survived several clashes and invasions of temperaments in the past, reinforcing my confidence in the quality of friendship which I am capable to establish.
My network is so vast and dynamic. I acted like a conduit. My friends eventually became friends widening or expanding our circle. Some became very good friends too while others remained as acquaintances. Of course, you cannot impose friendship. This is a cardinal rule. I tried to disprove this rule but I failed. There were some friends I tried to bridge however notwithstanding the effort they ended neither as friends nor acquaintances. When asked, they would simply say that no bond exists. Amusingly, there were also incidents that enemies have to cross each other’s path because of me. I actually acquired the skills of mediation and arbitration because of these climatic episodes.
Though I already learned many lessons about friendship, my leaning to the belief that I’m a connoisseur of friendship shatters those lessons I learned. Oftentimes this disorder exposes me in looming emotional distress. The turning point of this realization came when a friendship which I embedded for about three years faltered. My trusting nature is now something I mistrust. It was really my fault for having invested too much emotion on a friendship knowing that it is supposedly uncompromising. My tendency to expect for reciprocity breaks the general rule of true friendship. I am fully aware that to quantify friendship is a taboo. But how do you expect me to behave if I feel aggrieved, prejudiced and betrayed. How can I control myself if caught in the web of anxiety and distrust? The situation induces me to choose an entirely different gauge for friendship. I hate deception and hypocrisy and so I speak of the realistic point of view of friendship.
Oftentimes, people prefer to search for more rather than to enhance those that already exist. A friendship for twenty years is something I can sing with my own praises. On the other hand, it is now the source of my guilt or regret. I listed litany of complaints against my so-called “good friends” who wronged me, but I never had the chance to question myself for neglecting a friend who unobtrusively stood by me all these years. This friend showered me with attention, care and even material things yet no reciprocity was demanded. I took for granted our friendship simply because it was unconditional and unqualified. I was never scared to lose this friend. Why? Our friendship is beyond physical presence. We’ve been away from each other for months or even years, but we still ended up being together most of the time. Just like sisters, we are unaffected by our imperfections. We developed some sort of immunity from our unpleasant traits. Treating her as one of my siblings warded off any opportunity for me to grasp her importance as a FRIEND. We call each other best friends for many years. It was quite easy for me to articulate said introduction.
But today is different! Not only that I value any introduction I make with regards to this friend, I sincerely stand with pride being beside her. I cherish every moment I am with her., I appreciate everything she did for me and my immediate family. I know she loves me and for this, she also learned to love those whom I love.
Shrouded by exhaustion, I decided to stop searching; A time to finally surrender my self-importance. I now thank those friends who mistreated me. It was through these painful experiences I realized what I have failed to cultivate these past years… a relationship that is worth preserving. With full of sentiments, I salute my BEST FRIEND FOR TWENTY FIVE YEARS. I renew my friendship this time with maturity and commitment. I will grow old with you, I will respect your person and I will love you unconditionally and always for what you are!
In the end, a prodigal friend like me when reformed can still be a true friend.
What a touching and fitting tribute to a friend.
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